Búscale sentido a la vida
Te lo suplico ¡no vivas solo por tus hijos!
No solo NO lo necesitan, eso les hace daño.
Cuando el niño se convierte en la razón de vivir de sus padres eso es demasiado para él. Es como si lo encerraran en una habitación en la que un día se acabará el aire; aunque al principio puede respirar, llegará el día que empiece a ahogarse. Ahogarse en medio de tanto amor y cuidado.
Por eso te suplico, no vivas solo por tus hijos. Encuéntrale otro significado a la vida, encuéntrale otro sentido al hecho de ser papá o mamá. Para que los niños que nazcan en nuestro planeta no se conviertan en deudores y víctimas de tu caridad y cuidado.
Ama a tu cónyuge. Los niños crecerán y él o ella se quedará contigo. Puedes ser tú quien de ejemplo a los niños acerca de cómo llevar una vida de pareja saludable, para que ellos mismos quieran tener su propia familia, pero también puedes truncar el deseo de tu esposo o esposa si te metes demasiado en los problemas de tus hijos y te olvidas de él o ella.
Ámate. No te olvides de ti mismo cuando luches por la felicidad de tus hijos. No te niegues un vestido o una corbata (por ejemplo) por comprar un nuevo juguete, no cambies tu salón de belleza o tu hobbie por pagar un nuevo profesor particular; si tú no cuidas de ti mismo ¿qué le puedes dar a los demás? ¿qué ejemplo les darás? ¿qué amor?.
Búscale sentido a la vida más allá de lo material. Esta vida no es eterna y así es aunque no quieras pensar en ello. La espiritualidad, la religión, las oraciones (o cual sea tu manera de expresar tu vida espiritual) pueden ser una fuente de energía y deseos de vivir que te ayudarán a no apoyarlo todo sobre los hombros tus hijos.
No vivas solo por tus hijos, te lo suplico. Cuando encuentro niños y adultos cuyos padres lo dieron todo y más por ellos, me duele mucho verlos a los ojos. En muchos de ellos veo mi propio dolor, veo tristezas, corazones rotos, almas vacías. Sus ojos gritan por ayuda, gritan de dolor, de desesperación y de culpa. Ellos, como todos los niños, quieren amar a sus padres, pero si lo hacen seguramente no sobrevivirían a sus cuidados.
Dales a tus hijos la oportunidad de vivir y respirar. Así podrán crecer y desarrollarse en el área que tengan destinada. Nuestro rol como padres es muy sencilla: regar a tiempo pero no ocultar del sol, proteger de las malezas; después el niño, tal como una flor, podrá crecer por su cuenta y mostrar lo mejor de sí.
La clave está en aceptar
No solo es el hecho de dejarlos ir, sino el de quedarnos sin ellos, que son dos cosas distintas, la primera es ley de vida, la segunda es aprender qué hacer con nuestra vida, ambas tareas emocionalmente difíciles.
La clave está en aceptar el pasado, comprometernos con el presente y creer en el futuro, porque todos los días aprendemos algo nuevo en relación a ser padres y aprendemos también que la familia es este lazo sólido, firme y duradero. La familia es eterna aún cuando los niños crecen y se alejan, pues siempre estaremos con ellos y ellos con nosotros. Porque la vida es un viaje con destino a casa.
Se vive de manera diferente cuando llegas a esta etapa sintiéndote plena y en paz, a que si llegas con resentimientos, frustraciones y expectativas; en el primer caso, vas a disfrutarla más que ninguna otra de las que ya has vivido, porque llevas en la maleta la satisfacción de saber que tus hijos tienen una vida propia y se hacen cargo de ella, además aún eres lo suficientemente joven para disfrutar la compañía de tu pareja si la tienes, y de tus amistades, y principalmente, cuentas con todo el tiempo del mundo para hacer lo que tú quieras, trabajar, pintar, ejercitarte, leer, en fin, un sin número de actividades que siempre hiciste con prisa o a medias.
(Los textos son de autor desconocido, fueron copiados y recontados por Adonis)
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