MI SOLEDAD Y YO

La soledad no es que no haya nadie.

La soledad es ir acompañado por la calle, ver algo que nos llama la atención y saber que uno no puede comentarlo, porque al que viene al lado no le importa, o no escucha, o se encoge de hombros, o mira y ni siquiera se encoge de hombros.

La soledad es que él haya regresado a casa, y en vez de quedarse contigo en la cocina mientras haces la comida, se vaya a leer el diario o a mirar el noticiero de T.V.

Y es que se olvide de que antes de irse a trabajar, a la mañana, quedaron en ir al cine por la noche y al llegar por la noche se quite los zapatos, la corbata y el saco y no mencione ni por casualidad la invitación.

La soledad es estar esperando, aunque el que esperemos esté junto a nosotros… Junto, al lado… Pero no CON NOSOTROS.

Oyéndonos, no escuchándonos.
Mirándonos, pero no viéndonos.
Estando… No acompañando, ni participando, ni tratando de entender.

La soledad es querer gritar que aquí, dentro del pecho, se revuelve un dolor formado por silencios, llantos disimulados, preguntas sin respuesta.

Es que no podamos decir que nos va mal, pero que tampoco podamos decir que hay una luz de entusiasmo y de ganas en nuestra vida.

ES RESIGNARSE que los demás lo vean a uno como apacible y dulce. Que piensen que esa apariencia es producto de una maravillosa paz interior, de una sabiduría que los años han ido dejando lujosamente en nuestro ser.

La soledad es empezar a decir: “Me da lo mismo”, o : “No te preocupes…”, cuando quisiéramos gritar:

“DEBE SER HOY Y AHORA”, “QUIERO IR… QUIERO HACER… QUIERO VER… QUIERO HABLAR”:
“Dios mío, quiero hablar.”

Hablar y hablar hasta decirlo todo, hasta sacarnos de adentro todas las palabras que el miedo y la tristeza y el desgano han ido amontonando y mutilando y nos pesan como si fueran bloques de granito…

La soledad es saber que la piedad de los demás no existe, que la infelicidad les causa espanto y miedo porque temen que sea contagiosa…Es saber que para estar acompañados hay que bañarse, hay que peinarse bien, vestirse cuidadosamente y parecer totalmente despreocupados y dichosos, sin necesidades apremiantes, sin problemas… Y sin que nadie, nadie sé de cuenta que estás solo.

Supe que era mi soledad

Llegué a mi casa, abrí la puerta, encendí la luz y no la vi… Con cierta risa burlona me dijo “aquí estoy, jamás me quedo, siempre te acompaño” y supe que era mi soledad… Vaya, dije, sí que te sabes esconder, ¿y cómo estás? le pregunte. Y me dijo bien y dispuesta a conversar, así que quien mejor que yo que te conoce para despejar unas dudas.

¿Cómo es que me conoces tan bien? le pregunté. ¡Aah! -Replicó, es que siempre estoy; ya son muchos años juntos y te escucho hablar, reír, te veo llorar y siempre termino por enterarme de ti.

¿Será posible que algún día puedas dejarme? Le pregunté, “no lo sé” me respondió; “Pero si te dejo ya no estaré más y estarás sin soledad y quizá te sientas peor que hoy, ahora te veo solo, y cada día más solo que nunca… pero no sé si algún día me iré.

¿Qué tengo que hacer para que me dejes? Le dije a manera de conversación, ya que estoy cansado de estar siempre solo.

Pues no lo sé, -Respondió certeramente diciéndome “solo tú reconocerás el momento y sabrás que me fui, pero en el hoy me encargaron secar tus lágrimas y quizá un día lo añores, porque si encuentras a alguien que seque tus lagrimas mejor que yo, solo lo sabrás tú.”

Me doy la vuelta y miro la habitación, sola y vacía, la luz de la luna se cuela por la ventana y ello te invita a escribir y a escucharte a ti mismo. Mientras volteo me doy cuenta que la noche está terminando y el día comienza a rayar, el canto de las aves se deja escuchar y la luz de la ciudad se apaga, pienso y digo “mis ojos deben estar hinchados de tantas lágrimas y mi soledad aquí conmigo”, como siempre me invita a descansar un rato, “hay mucho trabajo para hoy y si tienes más dudas siempre estaré aquí” -Me dice, “aunque por momentos me olvides sabes que al terminar el día estaré aquí para seguir secando tus lágrimas”.

Bueno soledad es muy grato saber que estas aquí, aunque cansado de estar solo me encuentro no me queda más que soñar que el día llegará y vendrás a disipar y terminar con mi soledad.

 No es algo…. Es alguien.

• Es mejor estar solo, que con alguien que tiene el corazón más duro que una piedra.
• Duele tener una persona en tu corazón y no poderla tener entre tus brazos.
• A veces las sonrisas por fuera, indican batallas por dentro.
• Algunas personas por fuera parece que somos de hierro, pero por dentro somos de cristal.
• A veces buscas algo y aunque no lo encuentres, sigues buscando y buscando como si fuese a aparecer. Así mismo pasa con el corazón.

• El problema con los amores imposibles, es que nos lleva toda la vida olvidar.
• ¡Qué ironía, después de un adiós no lloramos por los malos recuerdos, sino por los buenos!
• Ahora que te fuiste tengo que aprender a llevarte en el corazón y no de la mano como antes.
• Faltas tú y todo lo demás sobra en mi vida.
• Lo difícil no es decir adiós, lo difícil es aprender a no volver.
• Siembra distancia y cosecharás olvido.
• El problema es que a veces decimos adiós y dejamos la puerta abierta…
• Duele sentirse ignorado por la persona que más te importa

• Se puede fingir todo lo que uno quiera, pero una mirada siempre lo confesará todo.
• La herida que más cuesta sanar, siempre viene de quien dijo que nunca la iba a causar.
• Un recuerdo es una fotografía tomada por el corazón, para que un momento especial dure para siempre.
• Prefiero una soledad sincera a una pareja que me llene la vida de mentiras.
• Aprende a demostrar que no pasa nada, aunque de verdad pase…
• Soy cinta negra en romper mi corazón. Por cinturas que no he rodeado, abrazos que no he dado y labios que no he mordido.
• Hay personas que no demostramos nuestros sentimientos aunque estamos llenos de ellos. Sufrimos en silencio, amamos con miradas y hablamos con sonrisas.
• Él no sabía amar, yo quizás… Demasiado.
• Hay gente como yo que grita, llora, ríe, sufre, extraña, ama y odia. Todo en silencio…
• No hay lugar más triste que ese donde te recuerdas feliz.
• No ser amado es una simple desventura. La verdadera desgracia es no saber amar.

( Los textos son de autor desconocido, fueron copiados y recontados por Adonis)

 

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